It's been 4 months since our home study was sent to Korea. Wow. Hopefully we're at least halfway through the wait for our referral. I give myself 2 more months of waiting until I go bonkers.
Sometimes during this wait and time of preparation for our addition, I feel like I suffer from a split personality (no need for concern and please don't call my social worker).
I have days/weeks where I intensly read any and all adoption literature available and ponder over things such as ethics in adoption, attachment struggles, and how our child will process their story. I read blogs by birthmothers and cry my eyes out. I worry and have sleepless nights.
At other times, I want to be just like most expectant mothers and look at cute baby things and think about all the fun things we'll get to do with the little one. I want to pick furniture for the nursery and buy books to read at bedtime.
I wonder what kind of new world of emotions will present itself once we find out who our child is.